Chinese Penis Rejection

According to the Guardian Unlimited, the first successful penis transplant has ended in rejection. FTA (link): “Chinese surgeons have performed the world's first penis transplant on a man whose organ was damaged beyond repair in an accident this year. Although the operation was a surgical success, surgeons said they had to remove the penis two weeks later. "Because of a severe psychological problem of the recipient and his wife, the transplanted penis regretfully had to be cut off," Dr. Weillie Hu said.” Ooookay. The facts in this story are funny enough…so below are a list of one-liners and alternative headlines that will suck the funny out in true Monkey Fartz fashion: In Communist China, penis rejects you. Peking Dick Now Homeless At 1cm, Transplant Patient Still Larger than Chinese Average Dr. Weillie’s Willie Woe Dead Dick Dumped Man Rejects Transplanted Penis after Catching it in Bed with Wife Zombie Wangs I think that about does it. Feel free to add your own! Cartoon courtesy of: BoomersFunnies

The Would-Be Iraqi Penis Bomber...Oh...Pumper.

The Associated Press (link) reported:

"Chicago prosecutors [after they could stop laughing] dropped all charges Wednesday against a man who claimed an airport security guard misheard him when she thought he'd said a penis pump in his backpack actually was a bomb.

Mardin Amin'sattorney added that Amin, an Iraqi, has a thick accent and she herself had trouble understanding him until he brought the pump to her office. She said she recently learned Arabic speakers sometimes have trouble distinguishing "p" and "b" sounds..."

...and that apparently Iraqi men have small penises. Apparently, Swedish-Made Penis enlargers are his bag, baby.